Where do I turn?

I have believed for all my life that if we were to just turn to God we would be able to find all the answers that we dont know...that he would give us time, and experience allowing our faith to be built, our testimonies to grow and allow us to move forward in all the answers we know..But I have reached the point in my life where I am wondering where does my life begin? Where is it that point I reach when I finally figure out my purpose for why I am even alive? When do we finally come to understand my true beauty, my true potential. How do I even begin to look? When I sit back and try to figure out where I am going next. Will I be able to know how...where? what? how? I feel like in every area of my life I have waited for these moments..when I finally get to start living a life for me, when i know what it is like to pay for everything that was mine, to be able to get a career one day find a husband who wants to take me to the temple and will love me with every fault, insecurity and mistake. Will the mental abuse finally go away? Will the trials that feel as though they are never ending, finally end.. Will be I one day just come to understand the great person that I really am? Who do I even turn to when i am feeling like this...