November 20, 2012 As many emotions came over me in one moment...I was blessed, I was shocked, happy, relieved, wanted to laugh, felt like crying and mad..all at the same time..but why? Why would one phrase bring so many emotions? What was I to be feeling in a moment of celebration, everyone around me seemed to be happy for me, they were cheering, they were all looking to me as I saved the day. The man that I put every emotion I ever had, that promised me that he was gonna stand BY me through the good and bad, the ugly and beautiful...the hardships in decisions and concerns..but what i found all along is that he was never there..the times I cried myself to sleep, the accomplishments, the endurance, the inner strength and the battles i had to faced every single day I had to make a decision to stand against all odds. To do what my selfish desires were asking of me, instead of what truly was best for me..everyone around him seemed to remind him what a great influence I was over him...how he had never been so happy before...the question always remained of how he always seemed to be the one who had the upper hand, why was he able to win every argument we had...he was able to always seem to make it my fault, my insecurities, my family, my past...why wasnt what I gave him, ever good enough? But it always seemed to be when we first began. Why couldnt it be now? I found along the way that love wasnt what we shared between us... because now I can stand here before you to tell you, sometimes the ones we love and we give our all too...aren't meant to stay in our lives for forever. Just a lesson and a blessing to someone else.
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